When I look at forums on shyness websites, I'm struck by this - almost everyone seems to be focused on one thing - me, me, me. Most shy people, including introverts, HSPs, autistic people, etc, want to talk about the difference between them and the rest of humanity, and about their tribulations and suffering in … Continue reading Me, Me, Me
Those who, like me, grew up in the 1950s, and maybe some who are not so old, will remember the song Barbara Streisand sang in Funny Girl - 'People who need People' (composed by Jules Styne, lyrics by Bob Merrill) - which declared that such people are the luckiest people in the world. Whenever I heard that … Continue reading People who don’t need People – James Michener
In my book The Shyness Guide, I warn readers against committing themselves unreservedly to a diagnosis they've received, or chosen for themselves. Because of forty years working as a personal injury claims adjuster, watching psychologists and psychiatrists aggressively disagree with each other, I've grown wary of psychological labels. But there is one diagnosis that I'm not sceptical … Continue reading Highly Sensitive Person – HSP
Why do I call this site the Shy Highway? Because social people don't own the highway of life. Unfortunately, many shy people don't know that no permission is required to be shy and still go out in the world. What I'm talking about isn't just playing with words, but a real way of being in … Continue reading What is the Shy Highway?
In my novel Skol, during a 23rd century conversation between the robot C-2 and shy 17 year-old Simon as they walk through the silent empty halls of New York's Museum of Natural History, C-2 explains how the term 'introvert' fell into disuse in the late 21st century because people began to use it as an insult. … Continue reading Why Insults?
Though I've been told that my novel Skol is the best of my books, you would never guess that from its sales. My other novel, The Birdcatcher, has had many readers over the years, and the first edition of The Shyness Guide was once selling well enough that I was threatening to break even financially. Meanwhile, Skol has had no following at all. … Continue reading My Lost Book – Skol
The following thoughts only partially got into The Shyness Guide. Psychologist Philip Zimbardo, founder of the Stanford Shyness Institute in California, has devoted much of his life to shyness. In his 1978 book Shyness - What It is, What to Do About It, he says, "Shyness is a fuzzy concept; the closer we look, the more varieties of … Continue reading What is Shyness?
Are you aware that shyness seems to be increasing in modern society? Besides the fact that surveys, at least in North America, show the number of people who perceive themselves to be shy increasing (it's usually over 50% now), in sociologist Eric Klinenberg's 2012 bestselling book, Going Solo - The Extraordinary Rise and Surprising Appeal of … Continue reading Shyness Re-emerging
I must admit that my perspective on shyness is different than most. It's the perspective of a loner. During my life I've often been called shy, sensitive, or introverted. But several people, at different times, have also told me that I was the most independent person they'd ever met. Well, that strong independence is genetic. … Continue reading What does a Loner know about Shyness?